In a Blink of an Eye

You know how on movies, they always say things like
"Life goes by way too fast"?

I never used to believe that, as i sat at home, alone, bored,
wishing something exciting would happen.
I was just wishing the day would be over.

But lately, i've started to realize that hollywood isnt that ficticious.
This morning, there i sat, doing nothing.
The next moment, Alex was there with me,
And the moment after that, i was all alone again,
wandering around the freezing town of waverly.
I didnt even notice the changing of scenery until after it was changed.
Everything just changes sooo fast

Suddenly, i was just like:
'Hey, i'm in Jake Farran's car, on my way to walmart with him.'
'Whoa, I'm wandering around Fareway, eating doughnut holes, holding hands with Alex.'
'Oh my gosh, I'm standing here with a 500$ camera, taking some really great pictures'
'I'm playing guitar hero at AJ Schutte's house?'
'Weird, i'm on a shopping trip with Isaac.'
'I'm in a car and Matt Evans is driving?'

I never realize what i'm doing, until i'm actually doing it.
Like, i never would have predicted doing those things, but here I am.
It may be where i am now, but it will probably all change any moment.

What I'm trying to say is,
Don't Blink, or you'll miss out on the best of life.

dear daddy,

who am i supposed to be when myself just isn't good enough?

Is it supposed to hurt this bad?

9:54pmAlex
this is just a bad dream. im gonna wake up and this will be just a dream. its gotta be a dream. theres no way this is real.

"I don't know how to love you, but i cant walk away" -His status

12:15amAlex
heidi, i... i... i think im still in love with you

.

it's over.

Humpty Dumpty Sat on a wall.
Oh, and what a high wall did Humpty sit upon.
Everything was beautiful and perfect from way up there.
But then,
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
Who would've guessed,
Because Humpty looked so happy,
defying gravity that way.
And not even all of the apologies and kisses in the Kings army
Could put Humpty Dumpty together again.

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make me really happy.

when it's perfect,

it was like a picturesque moment. there we sat, watching the sunset on the river.
my head on his shoulder, and at that particular moment in my life,
everything seemed perfect.
it made all of the little imperfections in my life seem so minuscule.
and that's when i knew it was all going right.
as he slowly and cautiously leaned in to kiss me,
i closed my eyes, and kissed him back, truly meaning it.
"i love you," he whispered softly into my ear.
"i love you too," i clumsily murmured back.

cream cheese?

tonight, i was down, because i felt bad that i caused someone to steal erins money.
i was sitting underneath the bleachers, practically hating myself.

but then he came, with his gleaming, amber eyes.
and with one look, i knew everything was going to be alright.

he held me close, and stroked my cheek.
he whispered comforting things softly into my ear,
things that made sense.
things that helped.

he's the cream to my cheese.

the one that helps me through it all,
silently comforting,
never complaining.
passionately loving.

there's just something about the way he looks at me.
he looks at me like i'm the most beautiful thing he's ever known.
but not in an appearance way.
he looks at me like i'm the best person he's ever known.
i can tell that his eyes are piercing past my appearance, and looking deep inside me, and falling in love with the real Heidi inside this shell.

i love him so much.

=D

"My Version of Notes. ;)
Well, here we are. Almost a month and a half later, and im feeling like i've never felt before. You make me a person i've never been before and i don't want to go back. i definately dont deserve ur love, but i guess i must have done something right to deserve it. :) I know im not perfect, im a little slow, and not the brightest when it comes to relationships, but i hope im doing a good enough job for you. well, enough of this sappy talk.
Love you,
Alex "

p.s. he kissed me saturday night.

can haz extreme happiness!

Alex: We haven't kissed yet.
Me: Nope. Guess we haven't.
Alex: Huh. I'll have to work on that.

Me: Well, if you care about me, just tell me.
Alex: No, I don't care about you. 'Care' is too insignificant of a word. I Love you, Heidi. And I'll be yours for as long as you'll be mine.
Me: =] I love you too. *truth*